The RetroZap! Gourmet – UPDATE

by Joseph Tavano

The Final Four were right there for the taking.

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So, after publishing the game-changing article about Star Wars macaroni and cheese, The RetroZap Gourmet, I called upon you, our faithful readers, to find the final four boxes. And not long after, after some discussion with RetroZap! writer Mike MacDonald, a conclusion had been reached:

The other four boxes were not other characters–they were the other halves of the characters I had already collected! And so, on our biweekly trip to the supermarket this weekend, I retrieved the remaining boxes of glory.

A number of things coalesced once all eight boxes were united.

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First, Artoo does, in fact, have a quote!

“Beeep booop. it’s cheesy.”

Where to begin with this one? The spelling? The lack of a capital letter on that second sentence? The fact that Artoo Detoo has never spoken a word of English, Basic, or any other language ever?! Who approved this one? For that matter, Yoda and Threepio’s boxes missed that capital letter, too. But not Vader. What gives? It’s these type of arbitrary inconsistencies that haunt me to no end.

Second, I did not notice until now that each character had a distinct background! Vader has the Death Star II, which is appropriate, and Artoo has an X-Wing–also appropriate. However, they paired Yoda with a TIE Fighter, which makes absolutely no sense. And Threepio get a vaguely blue planet (Alderaan, perhaps?), which is just weird. They sort of gave up on Yoda and Threepio, if you ask me.

So there you have it: an odyssey in orange, a macaroni mind-trip come to an end.

JT

 

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